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post #76 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-11-2012, 10:02 PM
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I think we can officially consider this thread derailed.

The voices in my head don't like you.

If you are a fan of fat girls, Dave Matthews CD's are better than a ham on a fishing pole.

Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats.
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post #77 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-11-2012, 11:02 PM
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10 more days till the end of the world.
I wonder if I still got a shot with Selma Hayek.
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post #78 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 07:34 AM
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I'm not scared.
The government will protect me and provide for me.
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post #79 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 10:10 AM
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In the years between the time I graduated high school and now, I have either been working, been in college, or both. In all those years, there were 3 weeks when I was unemployed. I have worked as a janitor, an orderly, an exterminator, a tutor, a surveyor, a substitute teacher, a bagger at a grocery store, an electro-mechanical tech, a software engineer, a materials testing engineer, a movie theater usher, an automation/control engineer, a technical writer, a validation engineer, etc.

I have little sympathy for folks who won't work and claim that there are no jobs out there. More often than not, what they actually mean to say is that there are no jobs out there that they are willing to do.

Well, you can bet your ass that I never WANTED to clean sh1t and blood off of the walls at a hospital, but when I needed an income, I took the jobs that were available.

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post #80 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 10:40 AM
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The world is ending soon, man.
My only concern right now is trying to bang Selma Hayek.
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post #81 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 10:44 AM
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The world is ending soon, man.
My only concern right now is trying to bang Selma Hayek.
I typically gravitate towards blondes, but I have to agree, she is hands down one of the sexiest women that ever was.

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post #82 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 11:28 AM
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Want me to come over to the next family function and gut him?
Nah. He will get his one day. I could be lucky enough to see his truck stuck and I'll just stand there and take pics n taunt him. Lol.

When you turn your car on, does it return the favor?
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post #83 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 11:32 AM
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I got married young (no money, no big wedding) so my oldest sister threw us a party. She had just bought a house and had a big yard and garage and it was summer.
My older brothers/sisters actually grew up with all my (ex)wife's aunts/uncles. So, there were quite a few people there. Two big families of drunks, at one house.
The one aunt was trashed and she brought her drunk, trailer park badass BF with her.
He kept walking around, asking everyone if they wanted to arm wrestle him for $20.
My oldest brother walked up to him, straight-faced and said, "I'll knife-fight you for $30"..........
the guy turned around, walked away and didn't say another word to anyone and they left a half hour later.

Look on his face was priceless. I'll remember that forever.
Figured you would appreciate that story.
Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!

Coworkers looked at me funny when I snorted and began laughing at this.

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post #84 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 11:48 AM
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The world is ending soon, man.
My only concern right now is trying to bang Selma Hayek.
gonna have to stand in line for the gang bang

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post #85 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 11:53 AM
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Isn't Selma Hayak kinda old now? It's the end of the world. Go out and get a fresh one.
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post #86 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 11:57 AM
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Umad

I hate being bipolar ....... It's awesome!
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post #87 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 12:02 PM
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Originally Posted by RRzxter View Post
10 more days till the end of the world.
I wonder if I still got a shot with Selma Hayek.
i see your Hayek & raise you motorcycle racing umbrella girls




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post #88 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 12:06 PM
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Come on. It's all about Lindsay Lohan.

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post #89 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 12:16 PM
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I'm not scared.
The government will protect me and provide for me.
Dammit! If you would have bought American we wouldn't be in this mess!!


Wait.....

God damn Mayans.


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post #90 of 139 (permalink) Old 12-12-2012, 12:26 PM
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If it's the end of the world, we are going to need more than one, just sayin'



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