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#31 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 04:40 PM
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Bathroom etiquette?

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#32 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 04:42 PM
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Public bathrooms are a gamble. You gotta go in expecting the worst.
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#33 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 05:07 PM
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Public bathrooms are a gamble. You gotta go in expecting the worst.
You'd expect guys bathrooms to be the worst until you actually work to clean them part time as a teenager. Let me tell you, it's no fun cleaning bloody femine hygiene products off the floor of a woman's bathroom in a restuarant.

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#34 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 05:07 PM
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Literally in the stall at my last engineering job...


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#35 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 05:11 PM
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Literally in the stall at my last engineering job...

This is why all the toilets and sinks at my work function on proximity detectors.

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#36 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 05:23 PM
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I can tell that none of you were in the Navy. Try taking a shit on a Submarine. You get out of sequence with the lever and you will be coated in Shit.
Oh and don't forget the trough shitters on surface ships when some wise ass would light a ball of shit paper on fire and send it on down the trough.
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#37 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 06:03 PM
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I can tell that none of you were in the Navy. Try taking a shit on a Submarine. You get out of sequence with the lever and you will be coated in Shit.
Oh and don't forget the trough shitters on surface ships when some wise ass would light a ball of shit paper on fire and send it on down the trough.
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Yeah, it was pretty strange in Marine Corps boot camp at first taking a crap in a stall with no door while people were standing right in front of you waiting their turn and telling you to hurry the hell up b/c we all knew the drill instructors would not give us enough time for everyone to take a crap. You certainly gotta do what you gotta do, but when circumstances are not like that I just think people should have a little freaking etiquette? Based on the comments, I guess I am not alone which is good.


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#38 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 07:41 PM
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A few basic fundamentals should be instilled in every man for bathroom etiquette.
1) Courtesy flush: as soon as it splashes, flush that shit. No excuses, no need to marinate.
2) No physical contact should be made when a guy is pissing. There was a guy at my old office who would come in and slap dudes on the back to say hi. First time he got me, I nearly pissed on my VP when I flinched.
3) Conversations should stay minimal when pissing, and should really only be on topics you can't discuss outside. For instance, don't ask me about how the work flow volume report is going. If you want to talk about the new receptionist and how giant her tits are, feel free.
4) No pissing in the toilet stall, c'mon man grow up.
5) Absolutely no cell phone calls, but texting and internet browsing is acceptable. I'd also say no music without headphones, once some guy was blasting that regatone stuff and it threw me off.

I had an awkward moment that I think you'll find amusing. About 8 years ago, after a lot of drinking and some indulgence of the green kind, I got hungry. Just behind my buddies house was a McDonalds, not my preference but I was in no condition to drive. I walked in, saw a long line, and decided to go take a leak. As I enter the restroom, I notice a FOUL stench. I walk to the urinal and I was paralyzed in horror at the sight before me...

Some creative sonvabitch managed to drop a 18" log across the bottom of the urinal! This wasn't one of those floor models either, he somehow got his ass up there and laid it out, no skidmarks. I have to admit I admire his accuracy, it even turned up at one end where it met the urinal wall kind of like toothpaste does on a brush.

I stepped out and went to the counter to alert a manager, while waiting I had my eyes on a really cute chick working the ice cream machine. We exchanged a little smile, and just then the manager walks up blocking my view. "can I help you?"
"Ma'am, I hate to tell you this and I promise I am only the messenger, somebody defecated in one of the urinals in the men's room."
"oh no! Okay, we'll get that cleaned up asap"

I go back to making flirty faces at the McFlurry girl, when to my horror the manager walks over to her. "there's a mess in the men's room, can you go clean it up?"
I got into line to order food, right away I heard her come out yelling "I'm not cleaning that shit, get somebody else on that"
I walked out ashamed, feeling like she thought it was me.

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#39 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 07:47 PM
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Re: Bathroom etiquette?

I'm going to change your screen name to McFlurry.

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#40 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 07:50 PM
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LOL, that chocolate McFlurry was not in good taste.

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#41 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 07:52 PM
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Originally Posted by Drunk View Post
A few basic fundamentals should be instilled in every man for bathroom etiquette.
1) Courtesy flush: as soon as it splashes, flush that shit. No excuses, no need to marinate.
2) No physical contact should be made when a guy is pissing. There was a guy at my old office who would come in and slap dudes on the back to say hi. First time he got me, I nearly pissed on my VP when I flinched.
3) Conversations should stay minimal when pissing, and should really only be on topics you can't discuss outside. For instance, don't ask me about how the work flow volume report is going. If you want to talk about the new receptionist and how giant her tits are, feel free.
4) No pissing in the toilet stall, c'mon man grow up.
5) Absolutely no cell phone calls, but texting and internet browsing is acceptable. I'd also say no music without headphones, once some guy was blasting that regatone stuff and it threw me off.

I had an awkward moment that I think you'll find amusing. About 8 years ago, after a lot of drinking and some indulgence of the green kind, I got hungry. Just behind my buddies house was a McDonalds, not my preference but I was in no condition to drive. I walked in, saw a long line, and decided to go take a leak. As I enter the restroom, I notice a FOUL stench. I walk to the urinal and I was paralyzed in horror at the sight before me...

Some creative sonvabitch managed to drop a 18" log across the bottom of the urinal! This wasn't one of those floor models either, he somehow got his ass up there and laid it out, no skidmarks. I have to admit I admire his accuracy, it even turned up at one end where it met the urinal wall kind of like toothpaste does on a brush.

I stepped out and went to the counter to alert a manager, while waiting I had my eyes on a really cute chick working the ice cream machine. We exchanged a little smile, and just then the manager walks up blocking my view. "can I help you?"
"Ma'am, I hate to tell you this and I promise I am only the messenger, somebody defecated in one of the urinals in the men's room."
"oh no! Okay, we'll get that cleaned up asap"

I go back to making flirty faces at the McFlurry girl, when to my horror the manager walks over to her. "there's a mess in the men's room, can you go clean it up?"
I got into line to order food, right away I heard her come out yelling "I'm not cleaning that shit, get somebody else on that"
I walked out ashamed, feeling like she thought it was me.
Thanks Drunk (aka McFlurry), I am laughing my ass off!


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#42 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 07:57 PM
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Bathroom etiquette?

Lol


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#43 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 08:19 PM
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I was at a convenience store one morning to get something to drink, I had to take a leak so I went into the mens room. I hear another guy on the crapper taking a very loud dump and he was also on his cell phone. It was a phone interview for a job.
I was wondering if his interviewer could hear where he was and what he was doing.
I decided to use the air hand dryer instead of paper towels that day.
I aree that talking on the phone while in the restroom is not cool.

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#44 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 08:38 PM
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LOL curled up like toothpaste! I am crying right now!
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#45 (permalink) Old 01-23-2013, 08:55 PM
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Re: Bathroom etiquette?

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LOL, that chocolate McFlurry was not in good taste.
Were there peanuts in it?

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